The Unsung Hero

I was going to die today, but I didn’t know then.

I was sitting amidst a crowd where all were seated in a wooden chair which could fold over. It was a bit unstable and made a creaky noise as I was trying to make myself comfortable. The rocks on the ground made things even more difficult. There were lights everywhere and still couldn’t see the characters clearly without my glasses. In my forties, things hadn’t turned out the way I wanted it to. Working with the most respected men in the underworld, my brother and to have reached a position where I have to hide from him.

***

On the stage, the bhagavat was expressing the scene occurring, in the form of a song. The tone and the hand gestures he made were always something I admired. The chande, maddale and taala accompanied bhagavata’s song. The characters of the Yakshagana were moving around, dancing and expressing their emotions according to the scene. It was an art form I always admired. My dad used to take me to watch them when I was a kid.

All were awaiting the arrival of Karna. Bhishma was lying on a bed of arrows after being intercepted by Shikandi at the battle of Kurukshethra. Dramatic events had passed and he kept on chanting the thousand names of Vishnu as the war continued. Karna was going to take over as the man to lead the Kaurava army. A Sarathiputra to the society, but son of Kunti and Lord Surya and born as a result of a question to test the power of the boon granted by Durvasa.

“O Duryodhana, all our army is deprived of Ganagaputr Bhishma , It feel s like a oyster shell missing it’s pearl in the ocean. Pandavas were enraged. Only Karna can save us. Duryodhana, you know that he has abstained from the war all these days due to that remark passed by Bhishma. Now we all are waiting”, said the kings to Duryodhana.

The bhagavat was back on, as they moved on to the next scene.

Karna arrived to take center stage. People in the crowd were a bit excited even though most of them were dreaming. His attire was a black and white striped kachche, a black vest covered by the kavach and his kundal and a head gear (kireeta).

***

I remember the day I took over from my brother. He thought it was time for me to, though he didn’t know I was his brother then. He stepped down and began assisting with their usual businesses. The daily collections from the fish market, illegal goods from the ports and most importantly, the control over liquor business. The coastal town was run by these men and they had respect in the society. Their business might be illegal but when it came to the townspeople, they defended and protected them from harm and maintained peace and balance in their own ways.

***

Sarathiputra was set to lead one of the largest armies of the planet. A man who beared a lot of losses, lot of injustice in his life was now a king and leading an army. He addressed the kings with the voice equivalent to the roar of a lion-“O kings of great prowess! Gangaputr Bhishma who possessed firmness, intelligence, vigour, truth, self restraint, humility, modesty is now lying on a arrow bed. His leadership was what that inspired us, but now what’s the use of this army, this huge army. With the fall of Bhishma, Duryodhana has lost everything. His fall happened here in this battlefield, in Kurukshetra. He fell like a mountain. But you don’t worry, I will save your honor and fight for victory over the Pandavas. I will attack Arjunaa and make Duryodhana the emperor of the Universe. If I fail to do so, I will enjoy heavenly pleasures and meet Gangaputr in heaven. This is my promise”(“ Idu nanna pratijnye”)

Duryodhana expresses his happiness and Karna proceeds to the place where Bheeshma is lying on the bed of arrows. He touches his feet and takes his blessing.

Bhagavat continues with his song as Karna moves around asking for Pitamaha’s blessing.

“O Gangaputr Bhishma! I am Radheya. Bless me, you’re lying on a bed of arrows, it isn’t something that fate can just avoid. I am taking part in the war from today onwards. So bless me” he bows to Bhishma.

Bhishma opens his eye.

“I will conquer Madhyama Pandava and all the others along with their forces. Bless me”, he requested.

Bhishma blesses him, “O Ang Raaj Karna , with your support and help only, Duryodhana and his brothers are happy. You’re no less than a Kaurava and friendship is greater and thicker than relationship attained by earth. Command the kourava army and acquire victory to Duryodhana”, he adds.   

***

How did I end up here?? Was it the way I thought, the kind of place I grew up?? My dad?? I can go on finding reasons and giving reasons to myself, but it was my fault. Somewhere I always knew what I was doing was wrong, but even then I did it. I remember those days when dad used to smoke, gamble and drink lot as a adult. Always had this notion that this is what I can do once I grow up, the things my dad did. This was the decision that made me end up in this. Hiding in a crowd watching an art form is one thing that I never regretted.

***

It was almost midnight, tea and a fried snack was served. The snack was a dal mashed into flattened disc and fried. It was a bit hard, so ate a bite and threw it .The tea woke me up a bit. I continued watching the prasanga as the crowd decreased in size. I needed some time for myself and I continued figuring out things in my mind along with enjoying the art form I always loved.

Indra disguised as an old Brahmin comes to Karna with an intention to reduce his strength and to safeguard his son, Arjuna.

The bhagavat always did deliver it in a way we never understand and yet enjoy it.

“O great warrior, I come here empty handed begging for alms. I know you won’t disappoint me”

“My greetings to you, O Brahmin; I am in the middle of my prayers and usual routine. I don’t have anything to give you”

“You have it son. But do you want to give it to me”

“Anything, you say it; O Brahmin”

“Your Kavach and Kundal”

Karna realized that this was a ploy, it was some heavenly person disguised as a Brahmin. Karna unable to say no took of the kundal and kavach and placed it in the hands of Indra. Impressed by his charity, Indra says “O Karna, I’m impressed by your action. What do you wish for??”

Karna thought about it and asks for the Shakti and Indra grants it.

***

He knew he was going to die even before he entered the battlefield, though he didn’t deserve to. I remember the conversation with Guruji, my brother’s dad. He was always worried about my work style. People loved me and similarly they envied me. The amount of people I killed, this moment right now must be the curse of all those families. The most dangerous tool that ruins relationships, businesses and others is jealousy. The day jealousy entered into our lives. I was going to be kicked out with a touch of evil acts. As a result I had to escape, irrespective of the love people had on me.

***

In the battlefield of Kurukshetra:

Arjunaa and Karna are set to battle. The Shakti was used up on Ghatodkach, son of Bhima; A giant with tricks up his sleeve who would have destroyed the complete Kaurava forces.

Karna sets up an arrow, prays to the gods and sends the arrow flying right across towards Arjuna as they both move around the stage. The arrow sent Arjuna’s chariot a foot back.

“O Karna, I’m impressed”, said the Lord.

Feeling envy over the praise of Karna by lord Krishna, Arjuna set an arrow that sent Karna’s chariot a hundred foot back, at least that’s what the bhagavatha in the background said. Arjuna was expecting the lord to praise, Krishna remained silent.

“O mighty Vasudev Putra Krishna, I sent an arrow and it sent him a hundred foot back and I get no praise. But when he sets an arrow and sends me a foot back you praise him. What’s in your mind, O Krishna??” asked Madhyama Pandava feeling insecure and confused.

“Hahhaha, you have Lord Hanuman above you. You have me as your charioteer, you have the pashupataastra and still he’s able to send you a foot back. Hear in brief, O son of Pandu! I regard the mighty Karna as equal, or perhaps superior than you. In energy he is equal to Agni. As regards speed, he is equal to the impetuosity of the Vaayu. In wrath, he resembles the Destroyer himself. Endued with might, he resembles a lion in the formation of his body. His arms are large, chest is broad. He is invincible and sensitive. He is a hero, the foremost of heroes. He is exceedingly handsome. Possessed of every accomplishment of a warrior, he is a dispeller of the fears of friends. No one, not even the Gods with Vasava at their head, can slay the son of Radha. No one possessed of flesh and blood, not even the Gods fighting with great care, not all the warriors (of the three worlds) fighting together can vanquish the son of the chariot-rider.”, said the mighty lord himself.

***

I was better than him, but I never got what I deserved. For a new beginning, in my hometown continuing what my dad did; painting the characters and moving around with them. Though most of the colors were added by themselves they were times when they would need some assistance. This is something I have always loved rather than what I have been doing until now. To a new beginning, a new chapter, a new melas.

***

It started pouring heavily; people went running back to their respective homes. I sat there, enjoying the Yakshagana like I always did.

Karna took an arrow and pointed it towards Arjuna and tried hard to remember the Brahmasthra mantra and was unable to. The curse of Parashuram was taking its course. He was unable to use the Naga astra and Rudra astra, the celestial weapons given to him by Parashuram as he had promised Kunti that he’ll use it only once.

This was a moment when I had tears in my eyes. This isn't the end he deserved. Krishna planned it in a way that ensured victory to Pandavas, just like the initial deal he made by stating “Even if a single Kaurava remains, the Kauravas are victorious and even if a single Pandava dies, they lose the battle” Sending Kunti to emotionally manipulate at the end and making him promise and limit the usage of weapons, it wasn’t fair. It didn’t matter where strength was. All that mattered was which side you were on, the side which was a darker shade of grey.What is right?? What is wrong?? In my case we both are intermediate shades of grey and the shades are imbalanced and to maintain the balance… 

Arjuna sends an arrow flying across…

A bullet is shot from nowhere in the darkness and the heavy rain…

***